— I did not make a lovely pot of homemade chicken noodle soup last week that may or may not have poisoned my husband. He was not sick all night and we did not pour the soup out, just incase.
— I did not "sleep in" on Sunday morning, only to wake up at 7:21 a.m. I would never whisper loudly and impatiently poke Husband until he decided that he was awake, too.
— I had a craving for a cookie this afternoon and was extremely proud of myself for not indulging. So I definitely did not buy a massive, bulk package of chocolate chip, M&M cookies at Costco after work, proceed to munch guilt-free, and pack a cookie in my lunch for tomorrow.